Today I emailed the lady who adopted our dog Tilli over two years ago. The kids had been wanting to see pictures of her. She replied that Tilli had passed away early this year. The description of events sounded like bloat was the culprit. My heart crumpled a little bit. No, she hadn't been our dog for some time now, but I loved her a lot and so did the kids and she and her hi-jinks are part of our family folklore. Rest in peace Tilli. I hope you find heaven full of warm laps, dog friendly couches, unfenced spaces and unlimited snacks.
So I've decided to start weaning Elsa. This was a hard decision for me since I nursed Gwen till 2.5 years and it was a good experience for both of us. However, I need a break. I need a break from being pregnant and/or nursing. If we are going to have another child, then I need a good chunk of time where I'm not pregnant or nursing. Partly because I want to lose some weight (I'll talk about that later in this post) and I can't seem to go below a certain level while nursing and partly because, well, have you ever been so touched out that you just can't take another pinch, bump, bite or nudge? Where you feel like backing up, arms outstretched, and saying, "Hey, some space please!". That's kinda where I am. I'm a person who needs a little personal space to retain mental peace. That's why I could never sling my babies round the clock like some people do. After awhile, the slightest touch would make me incredibly cranky. So I'm still nursing her in the wee hours of the morning when we arise (5am seems like the hot hour these days), and if she wakes at night (which she's not doing anymore). Otherwise, she gets a bottle of milk. She does not seem bothered in the slightest by the change, and I'm ok with it too. I need to remind myself that what I did with one child is not required to do with another. Each child, each time frame, each situation, is different.
I'm on my 3rd day of doing Slim-Fast. I don't know why I chose to do Slim-Fast. Probably because its easy and convenient mostly. And I think it works well for my eating habits. So far its been ok. I had to change around the basic plan a little. They say a shake for breakfast, snack, shake and "side" for lunch, snack, then a regular meal for dinner, then a snack. Well I'm ravenous in the mornings and almost never eat lunch so I switched it to having a shake and toast or yogurt in the mornings and just a shake for lunch and this works better for me (and my blood sugar). I'm seeing if a straight calorie reduction gets me on the way. Right now its hard for me to find time to exercise. If I can, I will, but I'm hoping that cutting back calories to a much smaller amount and weaning should allow my body to release the weight. Last year I was walking almost three miles every other day for a month and cutting back calories and didn't lose any weight or inches. And my milk supply suffered. My body protects its milk supply! I don't have that much to lose so if I can keep on this without too much cheating, I should be done by August.
On Friday we leave for Spokane to visit the family peeps over yonder. Because my camera is busted, I won't have any pictures to share. Maybe I'll pick up one of those digital disposables. I've been wanting to try them. The kids are, of course, super excited because its HOTEL! And SWIMMING POOL! And best of all, FREE BREAKFAST! Heh, for these kids going to a hotel is just about all the excitement they can handle :)