Can I just say that I love this weather? I adore that its been raining like mad, and that I hear raindrops when I go to sleep and wake up. That puts me in a minority, and some may even say I'm crazy, but that's ok by me.

The kids both have been so enormously cranky. Ethan didn't take an afternoon nap, Gwen barely slept at all today and was crying a great deal. I don't know if it was her tummy or what. The only time she really slept was while she was in the pouch while I was grocery shopping.

We went to the library and picked up the books we'd put on hold. We had 7! Two were for Jason and 5 were for me and I still have one on the way. Its really quite exciting to have a huge stack of books to read. I go through them so fast that its a luxury to not have to 'ration' my reading. Most of them are historical fiction, based around the time period of Anne Boleyn, Queen Elizabeth I, etc. I even put another book on hold today. It's addicting, especially since you can do it all online!

Tonight we had leftover lentil soup w/ bacon and spinach along with some toasted bread w/ olive oil. Yum. I was again proud because Ethan ate it up. He loves lentil, pea and bean soups.

I'm feeling a wee bit better right now, but still struggled all day with depression and a general feeling of frustration. A few people have mentioned post-partum depression, but I feel like its not at that point yet.

Ok, enough typing... Off to read :)

Well thank goodness this week is over. The last couple days have been getting progressively worse and today I feel like it didn't get worse, but didn't really get better. It was just 'managable'. And 'managable' is passable right now.

Last night took a Percoset to kill the headache and wow, did that thing trip me out big time. I felt all floaty and dreamy. It did completely relax me and get rid of the headache, but was a little scary too.

I still can't explain why yesterday was so bad. It was just headache plus super cranky kids plus feeling like I'm so 'empty' right now. I think its a coping mechanism. I just stop caring that my head is aching, and that Ethan is whining or that I haven't showered in 3 days. You know when its really cold outside and you go out and you're freezing at first, but then you kinda get numb to it and after awhile you just don't feel it anymore? That's exactly how I've been feeling lately. Numb. Perhaps it will get better, perhaps not. I'll just have to wait and see.

We took Ethan to get his first professional haircut today. He did super great. The cut is ok... Once it grows out a bit I think it will be better.

I've been all interested in breastfeeding activism lately. First, Barbara Walters makes an idiotic comment on 'The View', then our own local Ken Schram does a commentary on it (if you watch the clip, make sure you watch till the end when his co-anchor tells him off), finally, today, I was directed to an editorial in the Seattle PI written by a smart fellow who tells Walters and Schram to grow up. I wrote emails to both Ken and his co-anchor... rebuking the first and praising the latter.

Well, I've held off Gwen as long as possible. The girl is hungry and has run out of patience.

Today was much worse than yesterday. Don't even want to talk about it. Maybe tomorrow.

I'm feeling rather blue, so this will be short :(

Went to OBGYN today for my 6 week followup. Everything is ok except for blood pressure which was still high. She would like me to see my GP for the headaches. She believes that if my blood pressure meds are upped, it may reduce their occurrence (currently they're about every other day). I got a prescription for Percoset though to kill the bad headaches that won't respond to anything else, so that's good.

Went to FM while waiting for prescriptions to be filled. Ended up buying some summer clothes for Ethan and, foolishly, buying some clothes for myself. Hence, the depression. Only one of the items I bought fit right and even it was not *that* great. It seems that no matter what I buy, in what size, the proportions aren't right. Either its too tight around the bust and too loose around the waist, or the opposite. Am I some sort of alien shaped creature? Waaaah!

My Mom and Jenni had cleaned the house up for me, put away laundry and did other assorted helpful tasks. Love 'em for it. Unfortunately, its been real rainy and the dogs tracked in dirt after only an hour or two of clean house.

Kids were real fussy tonight and dinner took forever to make for some reason... Homemade Mac & Cheese w/ Ham & Peas. Maybe it just seemed like forever because everyone was crying at me. Ugh.

Too crabby to type anymore. I'm headed for bed.

Ethan woke up this morning at 2:00 am... Luckily he put himself back to sleep. Then he woke up at 6:00 am and this time did not put himself back to sleep. Generally he sleeps until 8 or so, but his sleeping patterns have been all off and he seems to be woken by the slightest sounds. I try not to get aggravated, but when I'm already up two times a night to nurse, losing 2 hours of sleep does not make me happy.

Went walking with my Mom and Jenni today on the Cenntenial Trail. We walked a full two miles! I was very proud of myself, until I stopped at McDonalds on the way home and got a McFlurry. Oops :)

After we got home, I put Ethan down for his nap, but Gwen refused to sleep. She was very cranky all afternoon and this evening. Not sure what was up with that. I've noticed that she is very gassy all the time, and I read that sometimes prenatal vitamins can do this, so I'm going to stop taking mine for a few days to see if that clears up the problem and makes her more comfortable. I hope it does because otherwise I may need to eliminate other items like dairy and I'm not ready for that!

I made Thai Beef for dinner. It was very spicy and delicious. Even Ethan liked it! I'm so incredibly proud that I have a 15 month old that will eat nearly anything I give him! We're determined that he will be as non-picky as possible. Some days he is, but mostly he'll eat whatever we throw at him.

As we were all sitting on the couch tonight, we were asking Ethan to kiss Gwen. Instead of kissing her, he leaned right into her face and belched so loudly. I can't imagine he did this intentionally, but it was just the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. In that same vein, he is also trying to pee on me every time I change his diaper. He is in a stage where he hates having his diaper changed and so it seems he's found a way to make me pay! I will hear him attempt to go when his diaper is off and most of the time he's successful. I can't believe I have such a naughty boy :)

I'm still in my pajamas. That should tell you enough about my day :) Woke up at 5:30 with excruciatingly bright sunshine in my eyes, a cruel headache and little Gwen grunting next to me. She's a noisy little thing. For the next two hours I tried to get her back to sleep so I could go back to sleep, but unfortunately, she did not want anymore sleep. She wanted to play!

Ethan was a grump all day. We are going through another bout of jealousy which means he wants our full attention 100% of the time. Its exhausting! It also means he'll cry and scream and weep uncontrollably for no reason. Its like having a pint sized teenager in the house!

I post regularly on a message board having to do with babies, pregnancy and parenthood. This week I was voted as 'Parent of the Week'. Yay for me :) Basically all it means is that people can ask me a myriad of questions about various things. Its pretty cool, since I never seem to win anything :)

Went out on a limb for dinner and made a Mushroom risotto. Generally the boys love risotto, but they could not get over their mushroom aversion to enjoy the meal. I don't like mushrooms and I thought it was very decent.

Oh, I got the coolest thing today. A baby pouch! Its basically a baby sling, and you can hold the baby in a bunch of different ways On your hip, on your back, on your chest, you can even nurse them in it. Its double thickness of fleecy material and the baby sits inbetween, in the 'pocket'. It fits over one shoulder. Its meant to hold the baby very close to you to avoid back pain. Its also great because I can bend over very far without her falling out. So far I really really like it. My Baby Bjorn is excellent for a lot of things, but this will be a better option for 'every day' activities. Like right now, she's sleeping on my chest, in a laying down position while I easily type away.

I miss my grandparents :( They are traveling around the southwest visiting family and seeing the sights. I can't wait until they come back!

That's all for now...

Didn't post yesterday as I was too danged tired. We did a good amount of yard work. I used the weed trimmer on the front lawn, then mowed and swept up all the grass off the walkway. Jason then mowed the back, which is a dreadfully hard job (really, it is, I'm not being sarcastic!). I made a beef stew and we walked to get the mail and that was about it.

Gwendolyn got some gifts from her great-great Aunt Margaret in Alaska. She got a cute little bib and an adorable bracelet! I am behind in infant jewelry because I did not even know they made such a thing. Here's a pic of it on her:




After dinner,we gave Ethan his first taste of chocolate pudding..... Oh how he loved it!

You can see that he started out sweet enough...



But he turned aggressive when he realized that he had consumed all of his pudding....




Finally, he assumes a somewhat scary sugar-crazed smile...




Lets just say we won't be offering that dessert again any time soon!

Today we went to Mom's church. It was good to see everyone again! I feel bad that I rarely see the people I grew up with , even though they live so close to me :( After church we dropped by Trina's house to pick up some baby clothes for Gwen. We got 4 boxes! I do not know what we'll do with them because we are already bursting at the seams for clothes. Hopefully they're older sizes.

After we got home, we laid a very exhausted Ethan (he missed his morning nap) down and I went grocery shopping with Gwen so that Daddy could get some game time in. We went to Central Market which is not the place to go when you're trying to save money. Oy, that place is just chock full of cool foodstuffs, all of which are outrageously expensive. I hit FM to pick up some assorted stuff and got wooed by the kid art stuff. I got Ethan a Blues Clues coloring book, some soap crayons and finger paints. I can't wait to let him go crazy with that paint in the bathtub!

Oh, first week of menu scheduling was a success! We made no other trips to the store for last minute items! I made up another menu and we're going to do it again. If this keeps up, I can already see a significant savings.

I'm very weary in the mind right now. Part of it is dehydration (too many espressos today, not enough water) but also... boredom? I'm not sure how to describe it. I'd like to get some time off from the kids, but I have no idea what I would do or where I would go and frankly, if I did leave, I'd feel guilty because I could be using that time to clean the house or weed a garden or something. I don't even want to leave in a way, because then I'll have to put on something more than lounging clothes and that opens up a whole other thing of 'why does nothing fit me!' drama. I feel like I should have things under control and fairly scheduled by now, but its still a mess. She's only 6 weeks, and I know that Ethan didn't have a schedule till nearly 9 months (though he could have if I'd tried), but sheesh would it be possible for them to nap at the same time? That's the worst... as soon as one of them goes down, the other is up.

Well, enough complaining... Maybe after a good nights sleep I won't feel so morose and blah...To quote Scarlett, 'After all, tomorrow is another day'

Not much happened today. We hung around the house and played and watched TV and I swept. That’s about it :)

Ethan finally learned how to stack blocks and not just knock them over! I got a picture of it this evening. Here it is:

Ethan also threw his first major fit today. I'm not sure what set him off, but it started because he couldn't reach his book. Then he got the book, but fell down and from there it went downhill. First he threw his little fists around, then hit the floor, then spread himself out on the floor and laid there screaming and kicking. I was trying so hard not to laugh!

Gwen was quite enamored with her daddy tonight. He picked her up (she'd been sleeping) and as soon as she saw him she lifted up her head so high. I couldn't believe it! I grabbed a shot:


She kept her head up like that for a really long time too.

Later, he picked her up after dinner and sat her facing out so she could see Ethan. Well, she wanted no part of that. She just wanted to look at her Dad :)


We had one of my favorite meals for dinner. Chicken Veronique. Basically chicken with grapes in a cream sauce. Num. Had it with couscous and buttered carrots.

I packed up the Pack 'n Play that Gwen was supposed to be sleeping in because it takes up so much room and she's not sleeping there. She's basically sleeping in our bed all the time now, which is fine with us. She's been waking up only 1 or 2 times a night for about a week. I weighed her today and she is just about 9lbs. Ethan has his 15 month appt later this month (can you believe he's 15 months!) and I'm really curious to see about his height and weight. He's seemed to fill out since 12 months.

We have no plans this weekend besides going to Mom's church on Sunday to see her rapture play (and, as an added benefit, show off Gwen!). Maybe I'll get up the energy to do something fun.

Sorry these posts are so boring, but that’s my life people :D

Woke up with a nasty headache, but luckily it went away later this afternoon. Really need to figure out what is causing these because they are making me miserable :(

Gwen was smiley this morning and at one point was so excited that she actually giggled a bit. Huge smile and her body was all wiggly. Really adorable.

I made some foccacia today. Haven't made it in a long while and forgot how incredibly tasty it is. So tasty in fact that I've nearly eaten half of it myself! All crispy and oily and salty. If I'd made it earlier in the day its quite likely that I would have finished it all off and not even told Jason I'd made it :) When Jason came home he was begging me for coffee and instead I made hot chocolate. Between the half of foccacia and two cups of hot chocolate I was not hungry for dinner (and am still not hungry). So, Jason and Ethan fended for themselves. Ethan had leftover bean soup and Jason had string cheese. I've seriously got to watch my carboholisim or my baby weight will never disappear!

I don't have much else to say... Today was boring. Hopefully will have something more exciting tomorrow!

Lots o' pics tonight

Ok, here were the best shots we could get of her smiling. We had the same problem with Ethan... It happens so fast that you either get the pre-smile or the tail end of it, but rarely the actual thing :) Still pretty cute though.



Here's Ethan trying to be helpful by sweeping our carpet. He LOVES the broom. Terrifies the dogs though!

Gwen is in a growing spurt right now and is eating constantly! Its all good though because I want her to be more fleshy so I can put her in all the cute clothes that are just waiting.

I had a brief period of energy and cleaned the house. No energy left cooking tho, so we had mac & cheese from a box and green beans.

Watched Spanglish last night... Generally I am NOT a fan of Adam Sandler, but he was good in this movie. It was cute.

Ok, unhappy babies and Daddy are calling, so this must end for tonight :)